You know, it’s so easy to allow yourself to get focused on the wrong things. Personally, I struggle with feelings of inadequacy as a mother. Maybe I wasn’t as patient as I should have been, maybe I checked Facebook when I should have read to my child, maybe I got frustrated at bedtime, maybe they spent too much time watching TV…whatever it is, it’s easy for me to feel like I’m failing. Thank goodness for the words of scripture, for a loving and insightful husband, and for the peace that a loving Heavenly Father sends–these three sources always bring me back up and help me see things how they really are.
So, how are things really? Well, yes, I admit that I am not perfect. I make mistakes and it is good and wise to work toward improvement and progression. However, I do a lot of things right, too. I love my children with all that I am. I try to teach them Truths that will lead to happiness. I care for their physical needs. I tell them that I love them, I hug them, and I let them know that they are special to me. I care deeply about their education, I take them to the park when it’s nice outside, and I remind them that they are children of a Father who loves them.
I wanted to take a minute to reflect on each of my children.
Amelie One truth is that she is slow as molasses when it comes to getting ready for bed. It can take this child an hour to get her pajamas on, use the bathroom, and brush her teeth. And this can be so frustrating when it’s the end of the day and I’m ready to relax for a bit! But here are the bigger truths. Amelie has one of the most tender spirits I’ve ever encountered. She is sensitive–both to her own feelings and to the feelings of others. She is so gentle and has a gift for helping people feel better. She loves to love and be loved. Mothering her reminds me to be gentle and loving myself. She approaches life with curiosity and a strong desire to understand. What a gift she is to me.
Calder One truth is that Calder is all boy–loud, always moving, goofy to the max. And it’s not always easy for me to parent all the energy and dynamics that he brings to our home. But here are some more important truths. Truths that I want to focus on more in our daily interactions. Calder is such a friend at heart. He is so eager to be your friend and share his enthusiasm for living with you. He is jolly and silly and has such a sense of humor. He is quick to laugh and this is a blessing when it diffuses an otherwise tense moment. He has a tender heart and just wants to be loved. At the most unexpected moments he will give me a hug and a kiss and tell me that he loves me. And even if we had a rough day yesterday, in the morning he is ready to move on and has every confidence that I will be a better mother today. Mothering Calder reminds me to not sweat the small stuff and to see the joy in this life. What a treasure he is to me.
A sneak peek at his birthday pictures!
Easton One truth is, Easton can be a handful sometimes. But, truth be told, I hardly notice most of the time. Here’s what I do notice. Easton is such a joy. He is so eager to explore and engage and discover. He is full of wonder and reminds me to take a breath, look around, and notice the beauties of this world. He is brimming with delight and love. What a joy he is to me.
Although there are times when I worry about having four children and my own weaknesses, I know that my weaknesses can be made strengths, that there are so many people (seen and unseen) supporting my efforts, and that these little ones are pearls beyond price. Today I am just grateful to be a mother.
